Washington Nationals: Santa Answers Gift Requests
By Ron Juckett
Washington Nationals website District on Deck scored an exclusive memo to Santa Claus about what gifts certain players and executives wanted for Christmas.
Through an amazing stroke of luck, District on Deck has gained an exclusive memo from Santa Claus’ head elf Rudolph. The memo, featured below, features requests from members of the Washington Nationals and responses.
From a reliable, yet anonymous, source, we have determined the memo is genuine and shows tremendous insight as to what the Nats wished for on Christmas morning, aside from more egg nog and extra sleep.
Without further ado:
Dear Santa,
Per your request, here is what the elves packed on the sleigh on Christmas Eve for you to deliver. Regarding the Washington Nationals baseball team, there are gifts that needed us to improvise on. In case there is any follow up from those listed, you can respond in kind.
After you asked us to investigate how naughty or nice the team was in 2016, we determined with few exceptions that the Nats and fans were nice and worthy of their requests. Some were easier to fill than others, but we tried our best to fill each stocking and package with “Curly W’s” and packs of baseball cards. For the life of us, we still can’t figure out why they no longer include gum.
Anyway, you asked us to randomly audit four gifts and the following pages will discuss how we tried to fill their holiday shopping list.
Now that you are vacationing in Cancun, remember to lay off the hard beverages as Mrs. Claus has scheduled your physical Wednesday morning. Lay off the cookies and whole milk as it elevates your blood sugar.
Regarding specific requests…