Washington Nationals ace pitcher Max Scherzer was faced with tough questions post-game after his humanity was questioned during last night’s start.
After all, there is no way a human can pitch seven scoreless innings with nine strikeouts the start after he threw eight innings of one-run ball with 15 punch outs.
In the bottom of the second inning, Scherzer took a comebacker off of his left calf. Immediately, San Diego Padres manager Andy Green noticed something unusual.
“I picked up pieces of metal and wire from the field and showed it to [Crew Chief Gary Cederstrom], and he told me it wasn’t a reviewable play,” Green said. I don’t even know what he meant by that. I saw it come out of [Scherzer’s] calf. I had evidence in my hand and dismissed it.”
Perhaps there is more to the three-time Cy Young winner than meets the eye.
If today’s game stats hold, Scherzer will have a league-leading FIP of 2.04. In comparison, his career best FIP mark is 2.65, which occurred last season.
But now, those accolades and statistics are coming under fire with this new revelation.
“I never suspected a thing,” Nationals manager Davey Martinez said. “I’ve been around Max for more than a year now, and I could have never guessed something like this was possible.”
Over his illustrious career, Scherzer has pitched over 2,200 innings with a career earned run average at 3.20. With three Cy Young awards and six All-Star appearances, Scherzer’s path to Cooperstown seemed like a straight line.
Now, the Nationals might have to proceed without Scherzer, who could be facing suspension or expulsion from the league.
When pressed for comment after the game, Scherzer only replied with the phrase, “I’m just here so I won’t get fined.”
Perhaps this is an omen to former Seattle Seahawks running back Marshawn Lynch, who was removed from the NFL due to doctors finding that his red blood cells had been entirely replaced with Skittles candy, giving him uncanny (and illegal) energy on the football field.